Taking Care of Your Own Resources

Posted by Dori

As parents, we often find ourselves constantly giving—our time, energy, and love—to those around us. While this nurturing instinct is beautiful, it's equally essential to remember that you can't pour from an empty cup. Taking care of our own resources, including our mental, emotional, and physical well-being, is crucial to being the best caregivers we can be. Here's how you can mindfully manage your resources while integrating meditation and consciously focusing on your needs first.

The Importance of Self-Care

Not only during the initial time of motherhood, but many times after, there were periods when I didn't feel at my best, to say the least. However, I let myself stretch that way for a long time while taking care of my kids, because I thought that's what a decent mother does and that our relationship would be fine as long as I gave and gave and gave. I knew that all mothers sacrificed. However, the reality quickly showed me that the quality of that giving—my presence and my participation in that relationship—left a great deal to be desired, and typical reactivity more easily sneaked back in during harder moments.

The result was always regret; I realized I needed to take better care of myself to be able to offer the best care to my family.

If you feel low or overwhelmed for any reason, don't hesitate to ask for help.

Think of yourself as the foundation upon which your family's well-being rests. When you're overwhelmed and depleted, the entire structure can begin to wobble. Prioritizing self-care is not selfish; it's necessary. By putting your own oxygen mask on first, you ensure that you can better support those who rely on you.

Integrating Meditation Into Your Daily Routine

Meditation is an invaluable tool for recharging your mental and emotional batteries. When practiced regularly, it also lowers your reactivity when you're faced with the intense behavior of your children and other people. For that little moment, you can just be—nothing else to do, nowhere else to be. Just here and now. It brings you to another state. Personally, meditation has been a game changer for me as a human and as a mother.

"For me, meditation was a breakthrough. I found that taking just 10 minutes each morning to center myself before the day began made me more patient, more clear and connected. It felt like I was equipping myself with a shield of calm that protected both my well-being and my ability to nurture my family. I also got more done."

Here are a few tips to make meditation a part of your daily routine:

• Start Small: If you're new to meditation, start with just 5 minutes a day. Gradually increase the duration as you become more comfortable.

• Create a Sacred Space: Designate a quiet, comfortable space in your home for meditation. It could be a corner of your bedroom or a spot in your garden.

• Use Guided Meditations: There are numerous apps and online resources that offer guided meditations, which can be especially helpful for beginners.

Consciously Focusing on Your Needs

Parenting often requires us to be tuned into the needs of others, but it's crucial to consciously focus on our own needs as well. Here are some strategies to help you prioritize your own well-being:

• Set Boundaries: Clearly define time for yourself each day. Communicate these boundaries to your family and make sure they understand that this time is non-negotiable.

• Practice Mindfulness: Engage in activities that promote mindfulness, like yoga, journaling, or simply going for a walk in nature. These practices help ground you and can reduce stress.

• Slow Down: In our fast-paced world, it's easy to feel rushed and overwhelmed. Make a conscious effort to slow down. This could mean saying no to extra obligations or setting aside one day a week where the family disconnects from devices and reconnects with each other.

Slowing Down to Strengthen Connections

Slowing down is not just about reducing physical activity; it's about creating a mental state of calm and presence. When you slow down, you create space to truly engage with your children and loved ones. This presence not only strengthens your relationships but also models healthy behavior for your children.

Tips for Slowing Down

• Enjoy Family Meals: Make it a tradition to have meals together without any distractions. Use this time to share stories and connect.

• Create Rituals: Whether it's a nightly bedtime story or a weekend family game night, having rituals can help your family slow down and bond.

• Unplug Regularly: Designate times when all family members put away their devices and spend time engaging in activities together, like going for a hike or playing a board game.

By taking care of your own resources and consciously focusing on your needs, including the need to slow down, you create a more balanced and fulfilling life for yourself and those you care for. Remember, self-care is not a luxury; it's a necessity. By being kind to yourself, you are better equipped to take care of everyone around you.

How do you plan to incorporate more self-care and mindfulness into your daily routine?

Until next time

Warmly

Dori